Yojinbo

The headline is a little misleading.  I didn’t put a dead squirrel carcass in a girls car.  I wedged it between the sunroof and the piece of plastic wind deflector.

This is a another story from High School.  We were in 12th grade and it was Springtime and my friend Herb and I didn’t feel like staying in school that day so we went to his house around 1pm to watch some daytime TV.  I think we were watching the movie “Airplane” on TV because I vaguely remember the scene where the shit hit’s the fan (literally).

Around 3pm we figured we’d head back to school to see what our friends were doing.  That’s when the day started to get interesting.

When we got outside his house we saw a dead squirrel on the ground.  Not sure how it died but it looked like it had been there for a couple days.  This was quite a find and not something you see everyday.  “What can we do with this thing?”  we asked ourselves.  We knew that it had potential but we weren’t sure exactly sure what to do with it.

We pondered this for about 10 seconds and then the same light bulb went off over both our heads.  Put it in Kristina’s car!

Kristina was a Polish girl that we used to hang out with.  She was not very bright and pretty annoying and drove a Peugeot that she thought was awesome.  I have another story about me and Herb racing that thing but I’ll save that one for another time.

We put the squirrel in a shoe box and set off for school where Kristina’s Peugeot was sitting the parking lot.  We were delighted with ourselves and plan until we hit our first snag: the doors were locked.  Shit!  We’ve come this far, we must find a way to persevere!

The sunroof!  The sunroof had a little wind deflector that went over it for a few inches.  It was the perfect place for a dead squirrel.  We got a stick and shoved the carcass in between the sunroof and the plastic wind deflector.  Satisfied with our work we went back to Herb’s house to watch more TV.  A job well done.

Man was she fucking pissed.  She pulled up in front of Herb’s house about an hour later with her friend Jeniffer and Jennifer’s little sister.  I don’t know how they knew it was us.

They were in a rage!  The worst was Jennifer who was Puerto Rican and yelling at both of us like she was going to fight us or something.  Apparently the three of them were riding down the street in that Peugeot and decided to open the sunroof so they could enjoy the beautiful afternoon.  They got a big surprise when that squirrel dropped down in to the car!  I guess they almost crashed the car but somehow Kristina was able to regain control of the vehicle.  They were also worried about catching diseases from it.  Wah Wah Wah.

Ah the memories.  That was a great day that I will always remember.